We got a response from the Jewish Agency earlier this week about our Aliyah application. It wasn’t bad news but I wouldn’t call it good news either. We have to supply more documents. Well, actually, one new document and a couple of letters reprinted on official stationary. So, now we wait some more.
The problem I have when I have to wait is that I start thinking too much. This is the time when the unknowns fester and the doubts test my determination. I guess it’s a good thing. These times of reflection have served as spiritual reinforcement and have clarified my reasons for going home.
Israel is my home. There is an intense emptiness that has eaten away at me since leaving that I have longed to fill. I want to be whole again. A fellow blogger, Eli, posted a list along these same lines about the hole that is left. She is much more precise in her writing so I will simply second her sentiments and post a link to her blog here!
YouTube has been a wonderful source of encouragement during this waiting period as well. Nefesh B’Nefesh and the Jewish Agency have posted many Aliyah videos that have been both a source of tears and a source of encouragement. My wife and I watch this video all the time and, each time, it intensifies our longing and encourages us to NEVER give up.
In addition to the wonderful Nefesh B’Nefesh and Jewish Agency videos that have been posted there are hundreds of other movies that have been spiritually nourishing including one that I have watched over and over from Ronen Levi Yitzchak Segal z”l, who talks about his own longing to return and the spiritual reasons behind his beliefs.
His videos are a wonderful source of knowledge and caring that I wholeheartedly encourage you to watch. He will be missed by many (take a look at this beautifully written piece by Gruven Reuven) and, fortunately for those of us who never knew him, we still have a chance to learn from him through his posts.
Of course, I have been able to talk to many past, current, and future olim who have been there to listen, support, and encourage me and my wife whenever we have needed someone to lean on. It just goes to show that Aliyah the process is a collective experience. It is not simply about embracing your faith, your home, and your community; you must allow yourself to be embraced by your faith, your home, and your community.
I pray that one day we will all be able to go home but, for now, I will continue waiting.